Sellers often ask for feedback. That makes sense. When your home is on the market, every showing feels important, and it’s natural to want to know what stood out or what didn’t.
Over the years, I’ve learned that feedback is one of those areas in real estate where wording really matters. The same comment can land very differently depending on how it’s shared — especially when emotions and big decisions are involved.
As a buyer’s agent, I hear a lot in the moment. Buyers talk things through out loud. They process. They compare. Sometimes they say something quickly that sounds decisive — and then a few weeks later, after they’ve seen everything else available, that same house looks very different.
Because of that, I don’t automatically pass along every comment a buyer makes.
Before I give feedback, I ask my clients if they’re comfortable with me sharing anything at all. And if they are, I take time to think about how it’s framed. I try to keep it focused on facts and fit, not emotion or judgment. I ask myself whether the feedback would actually help a seller understand where the buyer is coming from.
At the same time, I’m representing the buyer — not the seller. It’s not my job to make the seller understand every thought or reaction my client has. Courtesy matters, yes, but my responsibility is to protect and advocate for the person who hired me.
There’s a difference between feedback that’s useful and feedback that can unintentionally create friction.
Helpful feedback sounds like:
the layout didn’t meet their needs
they’re looking for a main-level bedroom
the home feels priced above what they’re comfortable with right now
certain condition items stood out compared to other homes
What I try to avoid is language that feels personal, dramatic, or definitive — especially when a buyer’s thoughts may still be evolving. Comments like that don’t usually help a seller make decisions, and they can close doors that don’t need to be closed.
None of this means sellers don’t deserve honesty. They do. But honesty doesn’t have to be sharp. Clear, respectful communication tends to move things forward more often than not.
This is one of those things people don’t always think about when choosing an agent. You don’t forget how someone communicates or how negotiations feel. The tone that’s set early carries through the rest of the transaction, whether anyone intends it to or not.
For me, feedback isn’t about offering opinions for the sake of it. It’s about being thoughtful, measured, and fair — and keeping space open for whatever might come next. I also respect the agents I work with. I want to give them information, but in a way that’s constructive and still protects my clients.
This is also something I want sellers to be more aware of. Agents are becoming more cautious with feedback because they are representing their buyers. They want to make sure that if something is conveyed, it’s something their buyer is comfortable having shared — especially knowing that sometimes the house someone passes on today is the one they come back to later.
And how feedback is handled early on can make that path easier… or harder than it needs to be.
I think this is something that’s often misunderstood by both buyers and sellers alike----and this is that "The More You Know Moment" brought to you by Kim.
